What we think, we are!!

Just as the heart does things the mind doesn’t understand, the mind does things the heart cannot understand. The mind, the conscious and the subconscious is made up of perspective; perception. What we think, we see. A little cockroach scares the toughest of guys whereas a huge snake wouldnt scare a small child. It’s the perspective that the person holds is what makes things, problems, issues, glitches, big or small. It is the relationship between this perception, the mind and the world we see and believe to be that makes the globe go round…better yet in maddening spins of confusion and derangement.

I just came across a very interesting line from the song Hole by Malibu

“Get well soon.

Please don't go any higher.

How are you so burned when you're barely on fire?”

This got me to thinking about how sometimes the problem is very simple and easy to resolve or funnier yet there is no problem, however we create them. Blame it to procrastination- The next best way to enter the Devil's workshop!! 

After my one of my recent relationships, I was perfect. For once no tears, no remorse, no self pity. Until suddenly I started missing having my mind filled with something to think about and someone to miss. Caught totally unawares with this emptiness I didn’t know what to do. So I filled my head up with thoughts of the Ex. Wrong decision!! Very wrong..! Talking, thinking, missing, wishing to a point where I started missing him more than I ever had when we were together or when we first broke up. It was a relationship that I admit I got into casually but one I guessed would have lasted long and eventually turned serious but it didn’t. And for the first time it was ok. I had no expectations, no thoughts about the future and for the first time I was truly free, even while being with someone else. For the very first time I was truly a grown up, free of desires, free of expectation, free from want, free from need of anything apart from being together with him that too for a practical amount of time. I gave time to my friends, I gave time to my family, I gave him time, I gave me time. For the first time I felt like I was ‘growing’ in a relationship rather than ‘falling’ in love. For the first time I felt the lightness and the perfection of a balanced relationship and I couldn’t ask for more and neither could he. It ended on rough terms but I remember me in the relationship, blissfully happy, blissfully content. It lasted only about two months but I made such a big deal about it later, much later, in my head. How could I be so burnt? I was barely on fire..